Way back in February I compiled a listing of the fight game’s biggest swatters using a sprig of mathematics and a pinch of proviso. The suggestions for serving were as follows:
- All fighters considered have to be world rated (Ring Magazine’s rankings are perfect for such a task).
- Knockout ratios are based on kayos-to-fights rather than kayos-to-wins after I figured that a guy who’d pancaked ten tomato cans in his first ten fights could then go on to lose his next twenty bouts and still boast a 100% kayo record, which didn’t make sense.
And that was that. For the astute amongst you pondering why this article didn’t appear last week in the aftermath of Maidana’s win (when it may have appeared more relevant), I counter-punch off the ropes with this; two of the dudes rated here are wielding their rocket launchers for your delectation this weekend. Seamless.
These then are the ten fighters most likely to make Emanuel Steward’s Xmas card list, dudes who can switch off the lights faster than an eco warrior in summertime.
1. Vitali Klitschko, heavyweight
Dr. Ironfist proves that sometimes a boxing moniker does exactly what it says on the tin (hang your head in shame Anthony Small). Big Vit is a fearsome physical specimen, yet it’s the unorthodox punching angles he crafts for himself which accentuates the juice that sloshes around in his mitts.
2. Marcos Maidana, junior welterweight
Prior to the Corley fight, Maidana boasted a 93.10 % knockout ratio, which was more than enough to see him heading up the pack. One fight later and he finds himself staring upwards, dejected by a huge puncher who now looms over him. So now he knows how his opponents usually feel.
3. Juan Manuel Lopez, featherweight
JuanMa has flattened another good fighter (see video) since the last update as he begins wreaking havoc in the featherweight division. A puncher with a hint of vulnerability, Lopez makes for unmissable viewing and is fast becoming the heir in line to palpitation-inducing swashbucklers Tommy Hearns and Felix Trinidad.
4. David Haye, heavyweight
“The Bermondsey Bomber” rises three spots on the list thanks to the ass whupping he put on John Ruiz in April. Perhaps the most dynamic thumper of them all, a fight against either Klitschko brother would provide fans with the fireworks that heavyweight boxing has been so sadly devoid of over the past decade or so.
5. Tavoris Cloud, light heavyweight
Cloud may well be on borrowed time here. Since breaking into world class he’s managed only one stoppage from three and has been extended by veteran fighters Clinton Woods and Glen Johnson in his last two starts. Both Danny Green and Denis Boystov are jockeying to supplant him should he fail to lower the boom in his next appearance.
6. Kelly Pavlik, middleweight
Rather bizarrely, Pavlik is perfectly tied with the man below him here with an 84.21% ratio despite having scored 16 less kayos in 19 fewer bouts (whoa freaky maths). And at the risk of alienating readers forever, I’ve taken that sucker to 20 decimal places… If ever Pavlik needed a spectacular knockout, he needs one now to reignite his floundering career.
7. Wlad Klitschko, heavyweight
Dr. Steelhammer will retain his placing amongst the top ten power mongers regardless of which way his bout with Samuel Peter swings. With an incredible 48 knockouts to his name, the heavyweight champ is closing in on “The Brown Bomber” himself, the legendary bone cruncher Joe Louis.
8. Roman Gonzalez, strawweight
Every time I hear the idiom “The straw that broke the camel’s back,” I imagine Gonzalez attempting to usurp Roberto Duran’s feat of knocking out a horse. The hits just keep coming for “El Chocolatito” who seems hell bent on carrying the little-guys-can-punch torch lit by Michael Carbajal. A bout against Oleydong Sithsamerchai would land him a Ring title, whilst a rise in weight to take on Giovani Segura would bring him the exposure he deserves.
9. Yuriorkis Gamboa, featherweight
The Cuban speedball must lay waste to Orlando Salido on Saturday in Vegas or make way for the rejuvenated Danny Green. Gamboa’s whacking ability is a by-product of his blistering hand speed. Taken the distance for only the third time in his career last time out, he’ll be looking to return to destructive form this weekend.
10. Dmitry Pirog, middleweight
Talk about a gate crasher. Pirog was on the outside looking in until flyweight Zolani Tete went and got himself knocked out on Wednesday evening. The Russian firebomber exploded onto the world scene in July when he popped Danny Jacob’s bubble with a teeth jangling right hand, one delivered with love by all accounts.